我是个粗心人,平时糊里糊涂地过日子,不大注意收集资料,即便写些日记啊拍些照片啊,随手就丢开了,因此至今已经活了大半辈子,手头可以叫做档案的东西倒并不多——或许是本能地在拒绝档案也未可知。然而,档案两字却又是我拒绝不了的。那无形的档案在我很小的时候就紧紧跟随着我,伴我品尝人生况味,感受时代变迁…… 现在回想起来,大概童年的我还不算太丑太笨,因为老师们都比较喜欢我,让我象通常好孩子们才能得到的那样,担任班干部,参加朗颂啊舞蹈啊等等兴趣小组。三年级以前我是快乐的。那时我可没有档案意识。 直到有一天,老师在报出有我在内的一串名字以后,把我们称作“可以教育好的子女”,让我们去另一个教室开会,我才隐隐约约感觉到,我并不是单纯的我,而是还有什么东西同我联系在一起。老师在开会时提到我们这些另册学生的家长。原来,我父亲是“党员”,却不是人们敬仰的共产党员。这我模模糊糊没什么印象,因为大人们没跟我说起过。我弄不明白,老师是怎么了解的呢? I am a careless person. I usually live in a muddleheaded mood. I do not pay any attention to collecting information. Even if I write some diaries and make some pictures, I lose my hands. So I have lived most of my life so far, Not much - perhaps instinctively refusing archives is unknown. However, the word file is again I can not refuse. That invisible file when I was very close to me, with my taste of life taste, feel the changes of the times ... Now I recall, probably I was not too ugly childhood stupid, because teachers are more like I, let me, as usually good children can get that, as class cadres, to participate in Longshen ah dance and so on interest groups. I was happy before the third grade. At that time I can not have the file consciousness. Until one day, after the teacher named me a bunch of names, he called us “children who can be educated.” Let us go to another classroom for a meeting, and then I felt vaguely that I was not pure Me, but what else is connected with me. When meeting, the teacher mentioned the parents of the students in different volumes. It turned out that my father is a “party member”, but not the people admired Communists. I was vaguely impressed, because adults did not talk to me about it. I do not understand, the teacher is how to understand it?